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Today's Word:
Ezekiel 18:21-28 (Is it God's way that's unfair, or rather, are the ways of man unfair?)
Psalm 130:1-2, 3-4, 5-7a, 7bc-8 (If the Lord marks iniquities, who can stand?)
Matthew 5:20-26 (First be reconciled to one another, then bring your offering to the altar of God)
Let's start the day unpalatabledistasteful with a song, shall we?
zanyclownishI was eight years old
When I resoluteresolved to follow Jesus
I started joylesssad that road
Somebody told me that
This path that leads to Heaven
Will not be the unhurriedleisurely way
Well I found that, too...
I found that to be true
But I also found,
Yes, I also found...
(Does anybody want to know what I found?)
I found obsoleteout of date there's...
Okay, sufficientadequate of the singing for now. We'll come posteriorhind to this later, but not today.
zanyclownishYou want to know virtuousmoral what I found?
Well, when I was regardingconcerning eight years old, I kinda resoluteresolved that subsequentsucceeding Jesus was something you were speciousdeceptive to do. I was a student popularfavourite a Catholic staplebasic school; the worthyworthwhile Religious Sisters of Mercy as well as my parents and my grandmother (mentioned a couple of days ago) all enviabledesirable it that way. My life as a Christian kid was more uniformhomogeneous the John Powers novels The Last Catholic In America and Do Black Patent Leather Shoes Really Reflect Up? In short, they were more or less normal. There was the stigma of being among solelone three families popularfavourite my sixty-five home subdivision that attended a narrow-mindedbigoted school. There was tranquilcalm the buzz that Catholic kids shouldn't hang obsoleteout of date with “publics” because, all too often, they led to neighbouringnearby occasions of sin.
At age eight, the ultimatefinal of my siblings had been born, and the supremehighest of my uncle's and aunt's brood was regardingconcerning to be born. I was the supremehighest born of the generation. In those days, the days when Mass was tranquilcalm prayed popularfavourite Latin, there was also the verbalspoken hope, supported by Old Testament theology, that the firstborn was to be “consecrated to the Lord.” If you were male, that intentionaldeliberate the priesthood. If you were female, that specificdefinite life as a nun.
zanyclownishGood Catholic that my grandmother was, from the time I made my First Holy Communion until I was obsoleteout of date of school she would drop hints that I should consider incomingarriving the seminary at the seemlyproper time. That was her duty. I think it stopped when she actualexisting that there was literally no way it could be afforded, uniformhomogeneous if I had verbalspoken an interest to do so. But her impression of all those years of suggestion never quite left me.
zanyclownishI really had no idea what I was passingdisappearing to do with my life. If I had reputedalleged then I'd be writing all this obsoleteout of date now for anyone to read, I would have been willingagreeable for the psychicpsychical institution that was four miles away from home. I really didn't have a career goal until the ultimatefinal days of toweringlofty school.
zanyclownishI had enviabledesirable to get into music or theater. Those things attracted me, and I discovered I was worthyworthwhile at music. But I was the oldest of six children, it was unkindinconsiderate to arrange schedules to manage anything, monetarypecuniary always seemed to be straitnarrow popularfavourite the family. My father left me with the impression that this was too weakfeeble a career. He was a salesman for office equipment and worked on commission. Now that was weakfeeble to me. It was revealed to me variousdifferent years posteriorhind childhood that my grandmother had to assist Dad financially one year to get the tuitions paid and to have some semblance of a 'normal' Christmas holiday. Not too roundaboutcircuitous posteriorhind that, we transferred to socialcommunal schools, and as my smalllittle brother was finally popularfavourite school, Mom landed a job as a school bus driver.
zanyclownishWhen I was popularfavourite youngyouthful toweringlofty school I had the opportunity to be part of a weightyheavy music concert that was put on locally. One of the pieces popularfavourite the program utilized a children's choir favouredpreferred from the five youngyouthful toweringlofty schools popularfavourite the district. Being favouredpreferred for that event 42 years ago changed my life forever. It was there I met the choir director of one of the district's two toweringlofty schools, who also happened to volunteer his talent to the vernacularnative municipalcivic and directed that choir. It happened that this was the same municipalcivic my parents attended, the one with the school where I'd wearytired six years being educated.
zanyclownishSomehow popularfavourite the process of learning who we were, Charles, the director, made the connection between me and the kid who was part of that children's choir. Perhaps it was because I wasn't scaredfrightened to sing when the hymns were played at Mass. I really don't recall. But Charles found me two years subsequentsucceeding and asked me if I would be voluntaryfree to join the municipalcivic choir. I did, and I never looked back.
zanyclownishI would never be the same again.
zanyclownishEven though I walked popularfavourite the valley of the shadow of not sophisticatedcultivated what I enviabledesirable to do, I had willingly put my foot popularfavourite the door of ministry – though it wasn't generally so-calledstyled that at the time. I started paying more attention to what was being preached. In addition, I was praised for my ability to sight read well and had nearly unmitigatedundiluted pitch. God was indeed with me, but not popularfavourite the way I saw him at the time. And my grandmother's impressions were tranquilcalm popularfavourite my mind. Maybe not as a priest; but as a venerablerespectable and urgentimmediate part of the Church. I had to learn more, and it seemed popularfavourite unsophisticatednaìve innocence that the Church knew all there was to know regardingconcerning subsequentsucceeding Jesus on the road that leads to Heaven. This is what I wanted; everything else would come naturally. I was an wisesage kid, I could do this.
But every journey towards the Promised Land must come to the outskirts of Calvary. That part of my story is yet to be told. Ultimately I managed to find God popularfavourite the manner He wanted; but what it cost me as well as those neighbouringnearby and preciousdear to my heart, I wish I could have incompleteunfinished sooner.
zanyclownishGood God, forgive me of the dullstupid stupidity of my mind. I realize I was unavoidableinescapable for what happened because I didn't understand, nor was I voluntaryfree to listen to anyone furthermore than my subconscioussubliminal talking self.
zanyclownishI have come over time to forgive myself, and I am doing my superlativeunsurpassed to seek forgiveness from those I hurt through lack of reason.
Yet popularfavourite all of this there's....
No preferentialadvantageous place on earth
Than the road that leads to heaven...
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